What day is it again? Feels like that sometimes now, eh? It’s Monday and I always like to dress up but today I went a little casual and put on a Canadian Tuxedo. Got a new chair for my desk recently and it’s pretty nice. Not as comfortable to sit on for long periods but that’s ok. Need to stand up and walk around more tbh. One thing I love about my Apple Watch is the reminders to stand each hour. I’ve been meaning to write a review on it because there are so many great features that I now use every day. Pretty sure I got this chambray top from a clothing swap and these jeans are old ones from Cory Lee. I never used to wear jeans but I kinda like them now. Took a nap in my jeans the other day. Can’t wait to have clothing swaps again one day. Hope you have a great day & week! Tomorrow is 420, the start of Taurus Season, AND my blog’s 16th birthday! BIG ENERGY COMING THROUGH.

How you doing? I’m feeling the weight of everything this week and it is heavy. My new job is great but adjusting from 6+ years of freelance to work 40 hours a week has been tiring. Watching the news and seeing things get worse is extremely draining. Not being able to see family when they’re going through their own things is heartbreaking. We’re not even allowed to meet friends in the park anymore.  Each day this week I opened my blog admin to write something and ended up writing the title and staring at the screen. I couldn’t find the words to document the day. I try to appreciate something good each day like the sun, a call from mum, a good outfit, or laughing over DM’s with a friend. It’s hard to stay motivated/positive right now. Things are pretty bad. We can only hope things will get better but perspective is hard when we’re stuck in the middle of a storm that’s been going on for 13 months.  Today I woke up thinking about work and excited to get things done. My motivation slowly declined when I checked my phone, laid back down in my fully made bed, and stared at the wall for a while. Do you find yourself staring at the wall too? Next, I watered my plants and moved some around, grabbed some snacks, made coffee, and turned into the couch.  In other news, keeping this pandemic diary is surprisingly therapeutic. Despite some days where I’m completely exhausted, there have been a lot of good days. I find myself looking back and remembering park hangs in the summer, bike rides, cottage life, and great meals we made at home. Thankful for friends and family, also Netflix/Prime, good wifi, and snacks.  Sending you love, hang in there. ?

Saw this on a walk today. Made me think of this song. We all make mistakes, it’s how we learn. You can’t be too hard on yourself. Take inventory, move on. Don’t let a mistake define you. We are always growing & changing, it’s important to constantly innovate. Pick yourself up, move on. Tomorrow is a new day and your future is bright.

Feel like you need to take a minute? Me too. Inhale, exhale. Look around. Assess the situation. Feel the feelings. Check your surroundings. Take inventory. Reality check. Determine what’s real. Accept how you feel. Set boundaries. Cover your back. Protect your heart. Be kind. Clear your mind. Walk it out. Have a talk. Take a deep breath. Breathe. inhale, hold, exhale, hold How to Do Box Breathing Close your eyes. Breathe in through your nose while counting to four slowly. Feel the air enter your lungs. Hold your breath inside while counting slowly to four. Try not to clamp your mouth or nose shut. Simply avoid inhaling or exhaling for 4 seconds. Begin to slowly exhale for 4 seconds. Repeat steps 1 to 3 at least three times. Ideally, repeat the three steps for 4 minutes, or until calm returns. I didn’t make this up but I use it quite a bit to keep myself calm or relax for sleep. More info on it here or give it a Google to learn how it helps with stress & anxiety. Took a walk in the rain. Had a massage after work. Ordered takeout. Called some friends. Took an edible. Watched The Circle. Melted into the couch. TGIF. ?

Today was a busy day and by the time I finished my last meeting, I was almost ready for a nap. Here’s today’s smoothie bowl, I’m still obsessed. Tonight’s activities include watching Wheel & Jeopardy then getting ready for bed. Ya girl is tired, not sure if it’s the weather or general anxiety about the state of the world. We had out contractor Lindsay over to do some work on the bathroom reno and it’s slowly but surely coming along. We still have a sink & some fixtures in the living room from American Standard ready to be installed. Covid has really put a damper on this whole thing! In other news, a few packages arrived today including two new bathing suits, new boots from L’Intervalle (yes, again!), and this cute sweater from Made For The Lake Co. in Muskoka. On the back it says ‘Smore’s Club’ and it’s from their kid’s section. Will be perfect for summer nights at the cottage. ? Sean is up north this week with Emily for April Break. Today the government announced kids will be doing virtual classes indefinitely until the panini calms down. Ontario is reporting some of the highest numbers since this whole thing started and the different Covid variants are affecting younger people more and more. Watching the news is pretty depressing and there is really no end in sight. I’m trying to stay positive and focus on things that bring me joy but it’s hard sometimes. I really miss seeing my parents and I haven’t seen my sister in weeks. Hang in there my friends, we will get through this. Stay home, wear a mask when you’re out, and make sure to check in on loved ones. ? Sending you sunshine through the internet,

I know it’s hard to stay positive with everything going on but I encourage you to look for joy where you can. Go for a walk, call a friend, organize your cupboard, do a workout. Keep your spirits up! This will all be over one day and we’ll look back at how we’ve grown from it. Feels so good to be outside now that it’s a bit warmer. Looks like we’re gonna have a lot of April showers next week. Gonna try and find that sunshine in the little things each day. ☀️

Today was another super sunny day! I went to the Canadian Tire garden center to pick up some new plants in the morning before Sean and Em went up north. Last night I decided to put on a bunch of fake tattoos because why not? It’s not like I’m going anywhere where I need to be ‘professional’ and tbh, I don’t think anyone would really mind. I originally had a tiny moon tattoo on my face but I took it off before heading out into the world. Neck tattoos were ok but it felt too out of character to have one on the face. I’m not that badass! Went for a nice bike ride in the afternoon near Trinity Bellwoods. The park was so busy I decided I didn’t want to hang out there. One day last year, I was in the park when it was busy and it was all over the news about people breaking the rules. I was there alone and not in a crowd but I still felt bad just being near the scene. I learned my lesson that day and if I go somewhere with too many people, I won’t stick around. I do NOT want to get covid or god forbid, get caught anywhere with too many people. As I was biking my friend yelled ‘she’s like sunshine’, I carried that thought with me all day. Found so many bright & fun summer clothes when I switched over my closet. Felt great to try everything on again! She’s like sunshine!

Had a great week and was ready to close my computer at the end of the day. It felt like summer outside so I hopped on my bike for a cruise around the neighbourhood. I forgot how much I love bike riding! I’ve been drinking less lately but with the sun on my face and wind in my hair, I decided it was a great day for a beer. I stopped into Henderson Brewery just down the West Toronto Rail Path and cracked a can on the wooden platform. I love sitting there at the end of the day to watch the sun go down. Emily came back to our house after school today after being with her mum for the last two weeks. It’s official, we are the same height now! She is growing up so fast. It seems like just yesterday she was a little 8-year-old girl who didn’t mind me doing her hair or wearing dresses. They’re heading back up north for March April Break next week and I’m staying in the city for work. Hope you have a great weekend!

Today April and I met up for a socially distanced photoshoot at my fav rainbow wall on Orfus Road. Cory Lee and I shot here a while back before Covid started. It’s always a bit nostalgic to back to this area, my first ever job in Toronto was on Orfus Road at the YM Inc. head office. I was blogging on MySpace back then (2004) and casiestewart.com was born while working there in 2005. We totally underestimated how crazy the wind was but it made the experience even more fun. It’s amazing how spending a bit of time with a friend can lift your spirits. We laughed our asses off trying to get the right photos and I had a few dress mishaps à la Marilyn Monroe. ? See my video on Instagram here. I hadn’t posted anything on Instagram in a few days so it was nice to shoot some colourful photos. Before Covid, I always had places to go and things to do but over the last year, well, nothing has been happening. In other news, I’m really excited for warmer days & spring outfits. This weekend I’m planning to do the seasonal switch over and pack away my wooly sweaters for summer. Crossing my fingers that doesn’t jinx me and we end up getting snow again lol. Last year we had snow in May on my birthday! My thought for today is to try and follow the rainbow, you might find some gold when you’re there.

Well, ladies & gentlemen, we’re back in a full lockdown. The good news is they are now starting to roll out vaccines to anyone 18+ who lives in a hot spot area code. I’m happy for everyone that can now get vaccinated. We live in an area that’s right beside 3 postal codes in the new rollout but don’t qualify just yet. I don’t expect to be vaccinated until the end as I’m not high risk or essential. I will stay home for months if it means we can get back to some kind of normal. So, photos of me doing next to nothing with nearly no one will continue to fill the blog as I am determined to keep this diary going until this pandemic is over. I was looking at event photos the other day and really missing seeing everyone, being in a crowd. One thing I really miss, surprisingly, is joyfully yelling in a crowded place. You don’t really do that when you’re at home. One day we will excitedly scream together. I also can’t wait to talk about fun things again, events, product launches, lunches, dinner dates, dance parties, and more. Been singing this song in my head so placing it here for you, London Still by The Waifs. I listened to it heaps when I lived in Australia. Now when I head it I think of singing ‘Lockdown Still’ instead.