I have just completed six months with my new company. I am really enjoying it, my boss is great, its close to home and all the other shiz is good too. It’s clear that the management care more about their employees at this place. 6 months in and I’ve already had a employee opinion survey! As I am approaching the time for a Performance Review, I started looking for tips and stuff to make a review go smooth and set forth a positive road for the future. I came across this and found it to be quite funny…. Employee Performance Review terms… and what they REALLY mean Average Employee……………………Not Too BrightExceptionally Well Qualified…………Made No Major Blunders YetActive Socially…………………….Drinks a LotCharacter above Reproach…………….Still One Step Ahead Of the LawQuick Thinking……………………..Offers Plausible ExcusesCareful Thinker…………………….Won’t Make a DecisionPlans for Advancement……………….Buys Drinks for All the BoysAggressive…………………………ObnoxiousUses Logic on Difficult Jobs…………Gets Someone Else To Do ItExpresses Themselves Well……………Speaks EnglishMeticulous Attention to Detail……….A Nit PickerHas Leadership Qualities…………….Is Tall or Has A Loud VoiceExceptionally Good Judgment…………LuckyKeen Sense of Humor………………..Knows a Lot of Dirty JokesCareer Minded………………………Back StabberOf Great Value to the Organization……Gets To Work on TimeRelaxed Attitude……………………Sleeps At DeskWork Is First Priority………………Too Ugly To Get A DateIndependent Worker………………….Nobody Knows What He/She DoesGreat Presentation Skills……………Able To Make Thing Up On The SpotGood Communication Skills……………Spends Lots of Time on PhoneLoyal……………………………..Can’t Get a Job Anywhere Else

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